Lesson On Thoughts...

I heard something that really spoke to me this weekend. Throughout different paths in my healing journey, I have found myself battling intrusive thoughts. I have tried with everything in me to "take thoughts captive". Sometimes this is easy, sometimes I have felt that I have failed miserably. I have done everything, from counseling, to burying myself in the Word... From cranking up praise music, singing, playing guitar; to praying and telling my mind to "STOP!" Outloud, even. This weekend I was totally blessed by a another possible approach... INVESTIGATE! When an intrusive thought comes to mind, check it out. Find out what is behind the thought. This really spoke to me, as this has been somewhat of a battle for me since even before the healing process began. In fact, I wish I would have known this years ago...then again, I didn't have a relationship with Jesus at that time. I was running from everything, and there was no way i was going to embrace the thoughts i was having! But seriously, I am loving this concept! Perhaps Holy Spirit is trying to reveal something to you! Perhaps God wants to show you an area of healing in your own life. Or maybe He just wants to spend time with you. Ask Him what that thought means. Ask Him what is behind it. Because God is so good, He will be faithful to show you. If He brings it to your mind, it seems apparent He wants to show you something. Telling it to stop, or shutting it out, closes the door for Holy Spirit to work. Yes, there are moments when the enemy uses thoughts to attack... Believe me, I know. And if it is from the enemy, God will reveal that! And, He will stop them or show you how to stop them.

Lord, I thank You for this revelation. I praise You that You care sooo much about us... Even our thoughts. Thank You for your faithfulness! Thank You for never letting us go! Thank You for Your gentle nature. Thank You for allowing thoughts to enter our mind for healing. Thank You for bringing these things to our attention! You are so good!

It's All About Me... Or Is It?

Being a wife and a mom of 4 boys, ages ranging from 4-15, I often find myself wondering whether I'm coming or going! I believe all moms understand that dilemma! And if you are anything like me, you find yourself, at the end of the day, loving every minute of it! Yes, it feels a bit stressful, but the joy and pride I feel when I look at my boys makes my heart swell to the point that I fear it may even burst! Before becoming a stay at home mom, I worked full-time, had a part-time job, and also coached 2 sports throughout the year. Looking back at that crazy schedule, I wonder how we ever survived as a family! I missed so many little things with my older boys that I never even realized, until I was forced to slow down and do nothing. I'm blessed to enjoy those things now... And I'm loving it! The world revolved around my schedule, and my boys' schedules, and honestly, I thought life was great! I was making an impact in my job, I was touching lives, I was truly making a difference! We attended church, we read the Word and we took time for family vacations, which seemed to be more stressful than what they were worth, but we were doing it, and I truly believed we had it all! We survived, and I thought we were thriving! Oh, how deceived I was! I felt something was missing, but I couldn't define what it was, therefore I kept adding busyness to my life to fill that void. When the day came that my world seemed to come to an abrupt halt, I didn't know what I would do. I honestly didn't think i could survive. I didn't know how to live life like this! I felt I had totally lost my identity, because I identified myself by the things I did. I didn't even know who I truly was. This became apparent to me when someone asked me "what's your favorite color?" I was so disconnected with myself that I couldn't even answer that. I had no idea what my favorite color was. In fact, I didn't know anything that I enjoyed. Long and short of it all, I began a serious journey of discovering who I am...by learning who God is. He tells us who we are through His Word! We are the salt of the earth (Matt 5:13), the light of the world (Matt 5:14), children of God (John 1:12), a channel of Christ's life and His friend (John 15:5), chosen (John 15:16, Col. 3:12, Thess. 1:14), a joint heir with Christ (Rom 8:17), a temple-a dwelling place- of God ( 1 Cor. 3:16; 6:19) a new creation (2 Cor. 5:17), righteous and holy (Eph. 4:24)....and soooo much more! Long and short of it all, I am a beloved and precious daughter of the Most High. All of the other things that I clung to, to define who I was, we're all things that I DID, not who I WAS! I am so much more than that, because HE is so much more than that! To me, it was a revelation that became a transformation. In my heart, for my life, for my family. Thank You, Lord, for Your revelation! It is not about me, and can never be about me, until it is all about YOU! First and foremost. Then I become an instrument for You to use, to speak through, to minister through, to show Yourself through. I pray that it never becomes about me. Relying on my flesh, keeps me from relying on You, and takes Your hand out of everything I do. In my flesh I fail, but in You I am made perfect! Thank You, Lord, for Your grace in my life! For Your correction, for Your guidance, for Your never-ending love!

Beginnings...

I can't even begin to tell you how many times I've started a blog or a journal, with the best of intentions to write everyday the things that I feel or the things I pray, or the revelations I have received... Only to fail in being dedicated and intentional in my efforts to record these things. So I'm trying again. We'll see what happens! Lord, if this is the path that You have chosen for me, then impress upon my heart a desire to continue. A desire so strong, that I cannot resist! It is no secret that my soul cries out for You daily! Spirit to spirit, deep indeed cries out!